This popped into my head yesterday morning, and I found myself lost in thought. It's so very true. Things in your life can be fixed. The key is to invest in yourself.
Self-esteem
Self-confidence
Self-advocacy
Self-worth
Those four *self* words are HUGE, and play a major role in our success and how we handle situations that come our way. They are often times the most difficult to master. We can be our own worst critics and pick everything about ourselves apart. The truth is, we are all unique and that's a beautiful thing. None of us are the same, and none of us have life figured out 100%. We all make mistakes and we all have regrets; that's just life. Each struggle, each challenge, each obstacle is a chance for us to grow and become stronger; it's all about your mindset and having the right perspective.
Our lives are constantly changing. Change is inevitable. If you don't like how things are going in your life right now, you can work to change it. Look within yourself first. Ghandi says, "Be the change you wish to see in the world" and what he means by that is that by changing ourselves and becoming what we want, we change our world.
So, how does one accomplish this?
First, you need to build your self-esteem. Be nice to yourself! Stop looking in the mirror and picking yourself apart. Guess what? I wish I had a better body too. I wish I was born blonde. I wish I was a little bit taller!! We all wish for things like that. But you know what, if you don't accept yourself for who you are and what you look like, how are you going to expect anyone else to? Own the magic of you. Every single imperfect part of it. You are perfectly imperfect, as we all are and your imperfections make you, you! Someone out there finds them endearing. Trust me! Embrace them.
Next you need to work on your self-confidence. Totally different than your self-esteem. You can be awesome to yourself, but completely lack confidence in your abilities, and your self-confidence in situations can vary. In my job, I'm confident in a few areas that I specialize in, but not all. I typically don't like to give information or speak on something if I'm not confident about it. I give it my best shot though, and if I'm wrong, I own it. I've found that people respect that. The more you put yourself in situations that you don't feel confident in, the more you learn from them and how to build and navigate your self-confidence. Yeah, it sucks if it doesn't go well and you don't pass that test, or land that project, or you make a total ass of yourself, but now you know how to be better for the next time! Keep at it. You're not going to be the best at everything, but you can be the best at being you!
In your whole entire life, the best advocate you'll ever have is you. I'm serious. Friends and family can have your back and provide moral support, but no one can advocate for you better than you can. Do it. Speak up for yourself! Communicate your wants, your needs, your thoughts, and your feelings If someone is treating you poorly, tell them. If something doesn't feel right to you, listen and act on that. If something isn't making you happy, make a decision that will lead to your happiness. Get a new job, move to a new city, or pick up a new hobby. Take responsibility for your own life and have your own back. Stand up for yourself! You would do that for anyone else, why not yourself? Stop making excuses not to because you are worth it.
Know your worth!!! I have been so guilty of not knowing my own self-worth. Shame on me. Just like you, I have so much to bring to the table and don't even realize it. My whole life I haven't had much self-worth which affects my self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-advocacy. I've listened to people tell me I'm less than, and I came to believe it. I've allowed people to make me feel that way. Read that sentence again....."I've allowed people to make me feel that way." I've allowed it. Who had the power in allowing that? Me. Who has the power in your life for allowing things? You. When we stop allowing, we start advocating for ourselves, and our self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-worth grow. Set those boundaries, stop allowing people to treat your poorly and make you feel less than. That goes for you too; remember about being nice to yourself. You have so much worth and value, and you need to start recognizing it. Self-worth comes from within. No one else can give that to you. You set your value.
You are absolutely worth your own investment. So much changes when you start investing in yourself, and you'll find that you can accomplish most things that you set your mind to. I promise you, it'll turn your life around. I speak from my own experience on that.
You can do it! If it helps, then just look in the mirror every day and repeat after Stuart Smalley, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it people like me."
Be good to yourself.
